When was the last time you played BINGO? What do you imagine when you hear the words Let’s play BINGO?
Perhaps you see a vision of old ladies, gently calling B-6, using wooden chips or cheerful dauber markers to mark off B-6?
Well, dear reader, you would be WRONG! At least in the case of the BINGO hall in Shreveport, LA.
The BINGO hall has an official name which is: Double Eagle BINGO on Shreveport Barksdale highway.
Upon entering, we were met with a massive space, filled with chairs and tables, like the ones you see in the picture. We joined a queue to buy BINGO cards and quickly befriended an older lady named Latriece (I think that was her name).
She immediately recognized us as new fish in the treacherous pond of Saturday night BINGO and told us that she would guide us on what to buy and how to play.
I immediately became suspicious. Isn’t playing BINGO just…playing BINGO?
HELL NO IT IS NOT, dear reader.
Ms. Latriece accompanied us to the counter and began to damn near speak in another language. They’ll need three full packs, with a Bonanza extra play and a this and a that and a rat a tat tat!
I eagerly handed over 3 crisp $20 for each of us and happily sat down, thankful to spend only $60 for a night of fun in my hometown.
And then began the rules. THE RULES OF BINGO.
Only ONE of the cards that Ms. Latriece bought for us contained a regular play of BINGO. The others were things like small picture frame and odds and evens and outer numbers only and kite pattern and so forth. You get the idea.
The image above is a face of a person who is accepting defeat. What had I done? What had I done to my family?
Well, the answer is that I’d accidentally befriended an absolute BINGO playing master, who was not only well-versed in playing these complicated kinds of BINGO, but who was also crazy enough to sign 3 unsuspecting newbies up for FOUR HOURS OF GOT DAMN BINGO.
We played our cards, with our brand new daubers, in confusion and hilarity, until almost 1:00 am.
My aunt made comments like ” Now this is not what I thought we were going to be doing” and I made comments like “I have a Master’s degree and it was much more easy to earn it than it is to play this kind of BINGO.”
What little mild buzz we’d gained from drinks at Gibbons beforehand quickly vanished as we tried to keep up with Latriece’s explanations, the BINGO caller’s fast and quiet calling style, and the chaos of it all.
At some point in the night, there was an intermission and I found this hilarious sign in the bathroom:
Thanks for the reminder, Greg!
All in all, we had a great time, mostly because we laughed A LOT at ourselves for the absolutely bananas, four-hour long adventure that we (I?) accidentally signed ourselves up for.
And NO, not only did none of us win a single thing after playing BINGO for FOUR damn hours, none of even came close! I think they must’ve given us the ‘newbie’ cards or the cards for the people who likely won’t come back.
We shall leave the BINGO (which we also determined is just a slower paced form of gambling) to the pros!
To the ladies with bags full of daubers, shouting out ‘pull card!’ and playing with serious and sincere for the SPORT of BINGO…you have my utmost respect.
xoxo-Nicole
The Path of Nicole 
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